Showing posts with label getting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label getting. Show all posts

Thursday, May 26, 2016

Write Your Own Heartbroken Poem To Heal








There are few things that compare to being in a happy, loving relationship. Being able to share your life with somebody else is on of the highlights of our existence. But, if you have ever broken up with somebody, then you know that the reverse is also true; being alone is heartbreaking.





Writing a poem as the result of being heartbroken isnt all that uncommon. Perhaps you have written them in other situations where you have been sad about something, such as the loss of a family member or pet, leaving friends behind or other events. Although it seems that nothing else inspires the writing of such sad poetry as a divorce or break up.





Why do people turn to poetry? Because it is such a special method of self-expression. Also, as long as you arent worried about being published, you can write whatever you choose. No need to worry about how good it is.





Theres also no need to understand the rules of different poetic forms. Forget meter and rhyming schemes and all of the other conventions of academic poetry. The goal is to feel better, not get a good grade. You are expressing yourself, not trying to conform. On the other hand, some people like the rules, and find it helps them to better share their feelings on paper.





To get over the pain of a break up it is vital to face the pain head on as soon as possible. You may want to run away from the situation or try to avoid the pain, but it will not go away on its own - it needs to be confronted. This can be difficult, and writing things down in the form of a heartbroken poem can help get you on the right path to feeling better after breaking up with somebody you cared deeply about.





So how do you do it? Just start writing. Use imagery and special words that capture how you feel, or use simple words in a simple way. There is no right or wrong way to do it.





You are doing this for your benefit. Do not try to write like the classic poets of centuries gone by. Be you. If you like, you can ever write everything down in a prose style, and then go through and make it more poetic. Whatever works for you.





Now that you have one poem done, write another one, then another. Explore different parts of your painful experience. Dont wallow in your pity...get it out of your system. While it may seem like you are just writing words, many people find writing poetry to be a very emotional experience. At the same time it can also be cathartic. Leading you from pain to happiness as you write more and more.





You do not ever have to share, but if you feel you would like to, or that it could help others, then by all means, go ahead and share. You can show them to people directly or post them online. Furthermore, if you want it, some sites will let others critique your work. But when it comes to your heartbroken poem its up to you.


Thursday, May 19, 2016

Best Seller Books On Relationships May Make A Fool Of You

If your ex has just broken up with you, you may be in the marketplace for books on relationships. But how do you choose the best books on relationships among the many offerings out there?

so confusedImage by rachel sian via Flickr



In this article, I will show you how to choose the best books on relationships. And the answer will surprise you. Read on…

First, don’t be fooled by fancy letters after a author’s name. There are many people who find school to be a convenient escape from real life. Instead of engaging with people, they spend their time in the classroom and library. As a result, they end up with a lot of letters after their names when they hit age 35. They use their degrees to indicate that they have “expert knowledge” of a situation. But does their expertise work in the real world?

Instead, you should look for books on relationships by authors who have been in the trenches. They’ve either put a bad relationship back together themselves or they have helped countless buddies do the same. These aren’t therapy patients that come in for the “fifty minute hour” either. These relationships are those of people the author cares deeply about.

Next, you want to find books that don’t boil down to “put the relationship aside for 30 days and work on yourself during that period.” This is all most “save your relationship” or “get your ex back” reports say. Many of the ebooks on the market turn that concept into 50 page documents. These are just pieces of fluff and don’t deserve your attention – or your money.

Instead, you should look for a book that will give you new information; information that you’re friends can’t give you.

For instance, will the book tell you what women crave the most? Will it give you a step by step guide for how to give it to her? Will the book show you how to recover from an affair? Will it give you specific techniques to get relief from your pain?

Finally, look at who is recommending the book. Do the testimonials seem a little generic? Were they written by the author’s brother and second cousin?

You want to find books on relationships that come recommended by a wide variety of people, in various situations, from all walks of life. If it looks like both a guy from England and a newly engaged woman from Kansas have used the book, chances are it will work for you.

There are many books on relationships on the market. Unfortunately, most of them are drivel because they weren’t written by someone in the trenches. As a result, they have generic advice that could be best summed up in a paragraph or two. Then, what recommendations the book can get are generic in nature, because the book really has nothing going for it.

Finding the best books on relationships can take a little work. But, everything about relationships are work. Shouldn’t you invest the time and money in the very best book out them?

You can check out the posts on REVIEWS in this blog. :-)

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Getting Him Back

Whether you want to get your ex back or you’re just worried that he might leave one day, getting the right advice is important. So how does Michael Webb’s new “Getting Him Back” book compare to the rest? Let’s find out…

The problem with most “Getting Him Back” books is that they usually say things like, “just don’t pursue him and he may eventually come back.” What kind of advice is that? What if he’s seeing other women? What if he’s moved on? Then what do you do?

That kind of information sucks, especially when you pay money for it! And worst of all, most of these books PROMISE they’ll get your man back. How can they make claims like this when there are 1000’s of possible scenarios you could experience?

Thankfully, “Getting Him Back” is different. It never tries to sugarcoat or get your hopes up. It stays grounded in the real world (where most of us live!)

And the content? Upon first glance I was very pleased with the content. The book started off with the most important topic of all : Do you REALLY REALLY want him back?

It covers this in great depth to ensure you don’t make the same mistake over and over again, and it does a good job of this. It covers 22 important questions on 3 topics including: How did you contribute to the breakup? How did he? How will things be different when you get back together? Questions you should ask yourself to help you make the right decision.

Once you’re 100% sure you want him back, the book moves into the breakup material. It begins with the breakup itself and covers everything all the way up to catching up with him again, covering each stage step-by-step.

I love that this book is FOR WOMEN ONLY. Most of these books are NOT gender specific, which of course is ridiculous because most of us would agree that men and women are completely different creatures.

So is the book perfect? No.

While using canned speeches could work against your efforts by making your ex suspicious, it still would have been nice to see some examples in this book to help paint the picture.

However, all in all, this is still the best “getting the love of your life back” book I’ve seen. I highly recommend it to any woman who wants her sweetheart back, or is having relationship trouble, or is just worried that her man may leave her one day.

For more info check out…HERE

Sunday, May 15, 2016

How To Escape The Final Stages Of Breaking Up

As we know very few people suddenly break up. There is usually a series of stages of breaking up that all couples go through. If it comes as a shock, you probably have the reason why you were dumped. You weren’t paying attention to what was happening between you and your partner. Otherwise you would have spotted he/she wasn’t happy, was ignoring you and doing their best not to spend time with you.

We all get caught up in our own thing from time to time and this isn’t usually a problem. But when your partner sees less of you than your friends and other family,it can highlight an issue in your relationship. If you do spend time together but are always fighting, you need to stop and break that cycle. Constant arguing achieves nothing and although initially it is fun making up, it can come to a point where you don’t bother trying.

Does your partner trust you? Do you trust them? Lack of trust is also a symptom of a partnership in trouble. If you always second guess your lover or expect to know where they are all the time, they will soon see that this isn’t love and may move on. If you are behaving like this, you need to stop right now. Unless your spouse has given you reason not to trust them, you should believe in them and have faith that they will do the right thing.

Are you on the same wavelength as your other half? Do they share your happy feelings and commiserate when you are down or feeling low? Couples who instinctively, know how the other is feeling, will overcome most of the hurdles that life can throw at us.

Does your lover share your interests and hobbies? If she has made an effort to get involved, this is a sign that she really cares about you. No-one expects her to join you for your 5am fishing trips but if she seems interested in listening to your stories about what you caught, what size it was, that is a good sign.

Your partner may have asked for a trial separation. Ok, so sometimes this is just an easy way of saying “you are dumped but I can’t say that!” But it doesn’t always have to mean this. Things can go wrong between two people and only time apart will help them to resolve the issues.

So if your lover does suggest this, agree but ask that they come to counselling with you. Show them that you do not want the relationship to end as they mean too much to you. Try not to put pressure on them and do not resort to emotional blackmail. You cannot force someone to love you but you can turn a bad situation into something a lot worse by appearing desperate or manipulative.

True love is based on understanding and respect. Showing your partner that you know this is a great way to avoid the final stages of breaking up.

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Getting Back With Your Ex – Should You Try

In can be difficult to cope with breaking up, especially if you had been together for a while and you had felt that you both were soul mates. You are probably also hearing everyone tell you to move on and get on with things, but that can be difficult if you still love your ex and feel that they might still love you too.




A friend ?f mine ?ften ?aid th?t ?n ex is ?n ex f?r a reason ?nd that ?ou sh?uldn’t travel back down an ?ld path, but thi? ?s ?ften easier said th?n done, ?s?e??all? if y?u see other couples re-uniting over problems such a? infidelity, lost passion or ? stolen heart ?nd go on to live happy lives together.

This begs th? question: i? gett?ng back w?th ?our ex ? good idea or should ?ou accept the situation and find love somewher? else?

To decide on the answer y?u n?ed t? fir?t determine th? reasons th?t broke th? tw? of you up. Relationships break d?wn over hundreds of different reasons ?nd n?t ?ll of th?m can b? mended. If you g?t back tog?ther ?nd the reason that y?u broke up ?n th? first place still existed then ?erha?s it i? bett?r t? tr? a new relationship.

If y?u ar? will?ng to change or make ?n effort to fix y?ur relationship problems (assuming of cour?e th?t y?u ne?d t? – relationships ar? ? two-way street) th?n it i? pos?ibl? that y?u ?ould g?t back together ?nd b? happy together.

There ?s st?ll a chance th?t ?ou can both be happy t?gether if y?u b?th ?till d? love e?ch other. Of c?ur?e oft?n it can b? difficult t? determine ?f your ex do?s st?ll love you a? you have b?th probably s?id hurtful things to e?ch other, so this ?s wher? y?u should trust y?ur instincts. Sometimes people ?ay the? the? hate y?u or no longer love y?u just to hurt ?ou ?nd d?n’t r?ally me?n it?

It’s oft?n a good idea to step back fr?m the situation ?nd try and l?ok objectively ?t the way y?u b?th act around e?ch other. If y?u d?n’t trust ?our ?wn instincts th?n it can b? a good idea t? ask th? advice ?f a good friend who y?u trust becaus? they ar? less emotionally involved in the situation.

The fir?t steps that ?ou take in trying to mend a broken relationship can be important in determining your success ?o ?t ?s important to try and k??? a level head.






from How to Get Your Ex Back - Make Ex Want You Back http://ift.tt/1FZxvVc

Saturday, May 7, 2016

Restoring Trust in Relationships After an Affair

Some people claim that an affair should always end a relationship. But I disagree. I believe that every relationship is savable if both parties really want to work on it. This article is about restoring trust in relationships.

Fog and FireImage by ecstaticist via Flickr


Restoring trust in relationships requires an adjustment in attitude and actions. Even after an affair, it is possible to save a relationship. But that starts with ramping up the level of trust within the couple.

If you have had an affair, you have had an attitude which allowed you to stray. There may be something at the relationship’s core that is diseased. But you can heal the disease.

What was it that you were looking for when you strayed? Was the sex humdrum? Was she too busy for you? Was she just not spending enough time on her grooming?

You wouldn’t have had an affair if the primary relationship was perfect. So, what needs to be done to fix it? Often that lies in self analysis. But just as often, that lies in the couple’s relationship.

Restoring trust in relationships means fixing the underlying problems. Sometimes that means going into couples counseling.

But just understanding our thoughts isn’t enough. The next step is to take concrete action in fixing the problems.

The secret to restoring trust in relationships lies not in talking about the right things, but in doing the right things.

One of the biggest things you can do is to make small promises and keep them. If you promise to take the trash out every evening, do it. And, do it consistently. When you demonstrate that you can be trusted in the small things, a gradual sense of confidence will be realized in the larger picture of the relationship.

Your girlfriend or wife is going to need constant reassurance that you have changed. This means that you are going to need to apologize more than once over time. You will also need to treat the recurring comments about the violation of trust as a matter of course. It is not easy for her to forgive the breach. If you want to stay with her, you will be patient with her.

This does not mean that you must feel guilty about the indiscretion forever. In fact, if you allow her to constantly guilt trip you, she will not be satisfied in the new relationship you are building. Just be understanding.

Finally, you need to put a positive spin on the incident. Treat it as an opportunity for both of you to grow as individuals and for the relationship to mature. Just as a bone grows stronger at the place it has been broken, a relationship can improve after an affair.

Restoring trust in a relationship takes time. It requires that you change both your attitudes and actions. But it is possible to heal the divide and be a stronger couple as a result.

Thursday, April 28, 2016

Steps on How to Save a Relationship

Jim works long hours and Lisbet doesn’t feel he is there for her. Lisbet spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and Jim feels that she doesn’t have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here’s how to save a relationship.

Children in a doorway in JerusalemImage via Wikipedia



First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving. While almost every relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work. Because if a partner has opted out and doesn’t want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.

Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.

Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a relationship. One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups. In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem. For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse. While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship. If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you haven’t dealt with the core issue.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can save the relationship.

Once you have identified the core problems, you can begin to share your thoughts. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partner’s concerns. Hold your partner’s had when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner talks about things that hurt you remember that he or she is not doing it because he or she wants to hurt you. Rather it is because they want to improve the relationship.

Once you have detailed the problems in your relationship, create an action plan to solve them. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. If you don’t spend time together like you used to, plan a date night every week. Take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together each Wednesday. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.

Finally, you should realize that saving a relationship is an ongoing process. You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back. There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward. Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.

Is your relationship worth saving? Feel free to leave your comments below ..

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Wednesday, April 27, 2016

How To Make Her Come Back – Guide To Getting Back Your Ex Girlfriend

How To Make Her Come Back – Guide To Getting Back Your Ex Girlfriend


How do I make her ??me back to me? This question h?s ?rob?bly crossed your mind man? times ov?r wh?le ?ou thought ?bout the breakup and it ha? y?ur head SPINNING. You think ab?ut ?ll ?f the possibilities, the things that y?u ?an do to get her back, and ?ou ??nnot come u? w?th a clear answer. Welcome t? the club, m? friend.

So many guys feel th? same way, but the thing ?f it is, y?u DON’T hav? t? feel that wa? FOREVER!

If y?u ?re searching for a guide t? getting back your girlfriend, then th?re ?r? a few things that y?u need to be aware ?f first.



Most relationship guides ar? sweet sounding and th?y make you feel l?k? y?u h?v? to be super romantic t? make ?our ?x girlfriend ?om? back to you. And most ?f th?m do NOT work!

HERE’S HOW TO MAKE HER COME BACK…

If you want t? g?t your girlfriend back, then ?ou h?v? to shake ?ut th? idea th?t ?ou w?ll make ?t happen by b??ng overly nice to her. That is th? wrong move, buddy. Now, I d? not m??n that ?ou ?h?uld then b??om? th? complete opposite and be??me a total jerk to ??ur ex girlfriend.

Not by a long shot.

However, if you d? start to act like a suck u? to her, then you ?an pretty much predict th? future… and it w?nt include HER.

Why?

Because she has t? feel attracted t? you, not obligated t? you. Most men wh?n th?? tr? ?nd act overly nice ?re d??ng it ?o th?t th?? ?an “convince” h?r to love th?m again. Well, ?t d?es n?t work lik? that.

TO GET HER BACK, YOU HAVE TO CREATE THE SPARKS…

Mending a relationship requires th?t th? sparks g?t brought back int? play. If ??u neglect this aspect ?f things, th?n you are g??ng t? end up being nothing more th?n an ?x boyfriend ?nd not her current one. To g?t her back, ?ou n?ed to b? abl? to make her feel l?ke ?he just cann?t resist you.






from How to Get Your Ex Back - Make Ex Want You Back http://ift.tt/1wIMXp2

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Getting Ex Back will require Patience And Understanding

  Relationships take work,  they are by no means simple.  In order for a couple to make a long lasting relationship they have to work at keeping one another happy.  There are differences and obstacles that can trip up any relationship.  There can even be times when the relationship seems over and you go your own ways,  it is at times such as this you wonder how to get ex back.

In many cases a break-up is the result of a simple difference of opinions.  Communication and jealousy make a big portion of the obstacles that need to be overcome to ensure a relationship to sort out.  Regardless of what the issue might have been,  almost always there is a way to work it out if both parties want it bad enough.  It isnt until they are gone,  that we truly appreciate them.

 More often than not it will take one person to leave for the other to realize how important they were in their lives and how unique their relationship is.  Often we love someone the most after they leave.  If we try hard enough we could figure out how to get ex back ,  but it will require learning to understand them and what they bring to the relationship.

 Before you can make an effort to win this person back you will need to realize that what happened caused some damage and it will take time to undo the damage for the two of you.  No matter who was at fault,  what matters is that you are willing to take the first step to make things right and hopefully get your ex back.  In case you get into it still blaming the other you’ll not be successful at reconciling your relationship.

 Keep in mind that whatever the specific situation was that broke you up;  chances are you both were hurt.  This means you will have to give them time to get past the specific situation.  If theyre not ready to move on and try again then you will not be able to convince them otherwise.  You need to show them that you are there for them and will be waiting until they are ready.

 By giving them time and starting back as friends it is possible to get them back by doing the same things you did to win them over in the first place.  After they have had time to heal and they see that you still care,  they will most likely be willing to try to work things out.  Remember that you will need to convince them that what happened before won’t happen again.

Friday, April 8, 2016

Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Does your to-do list look something like this :

· Walk dog

Felipe CalderónImage via Wikipedia


· Water plants
· Break up with significant other

Okay, while ending a relationship is hardly at the top of anybody’s calendar, the fact is that when a relationship has gone sour, someone has to make the move to end it. The truth is that many relationships last long beyond the “expire by” date just because breaking up is hard to do.

Sometimes a break up happens in dramatic fashion with clothes being thrown out of a second story window.

Other times, the relationship just peters out until someone says “it’s caput.”

How do you go about ending a relationship so that neither party gets hurt?

You need to get clear on why you want to terminate the romance. The immediate reason that jumps into your mind may not be the real reason. Once you get clear, the next step in ending a relationship is to get honest. That means that in your discussion with your partner that you are true to yourself and to them.

Schedule a mutually convenient time for the breakup. In general, it is better to do it in person rather than over the phone, but if distance is an issue in the relationship, you should do it sooner than wait for a time you can get together.

Get into a state of compassion when ending the relationship. If you want to stay friends after the break up, you need to conclude the romantic ties with love and compassion.

Don’t put your partner on the defensive. Talk about the things you’ve learned and the memories you will cherish that have come from your love. Be present during the break up. Your partner may become very emotional during this time. You need to respond to their needs.

Don’t take anything personally when ending a relationship. Your partner may say things they don’t really mean. Let these words roll off of your back.

Your partner may need to meet with you more than once to conclude the relationship. Or, they may need space. Give your ex what they need to get through the transition time.

But don’t let them make you feel guilty. You’re ready to begin a new phase in your life and it will not include a romantic relationship with your ex. It is best if you retain a positive relationship of some sort with them, but if you are ending the relationship for the right reasons, it is best for both of you.

Should you ever consider reconnecting? Does ending a relationship always mean “the end, close the book?”

That is something you have to decide. Virtually all relationships can be saved if certain conditions are met. If you have the time and are willing to make the effort, you can get through this period as an even stronger couple.

However, if you are determined to walk away, it’s best to end a relationship with a clean break and move on.

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Getting rid of Jealousy and insecurity





"Jealousy is an emotion, and the word typically refers to the thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, concern, and anxiety over an anticipated loss or status of something of great personal value, particularly in reference to a human connection."




The not so famous ,anticipated loss which has killed thousand , no millions of budding relationships still in their innocence. One person gets too attached to fast, fears that the other one isnt up-to speed, starts fearing losing something so great, pushing the other person away by starting to act weird. Not their fault, actually , you can blame all you want, but the harsh truth is none of you are at fault here . 

Everything got screwed up coz one of the biggest truth that governs almost everyone in this life and the world is ....



"With great love comes great fear of losing that great love"

That fear of losing, something that you love so much, the fear of something bad happening during the best of times. Its funny if you look at it in a way that you would never anticipate things suddenly getting better in the middle of chaos. It makes sense if you think about it...

People will always tell you to practice caution, always tell you to keep an eye out for some uncertain, uninvited, out of control , bad thing , that would just come and ruin everything good. They call it precaution, prevention. Basically keep an eye out so that a random bad thing wont walk in and ruin everything... But if that is true, and events are random, feelings and thoughts are random then why not be on a lookout for something random good that would just waltz in and ruin everything that is bad. Funny, right.


Ask anyone who has been into "the mode" for a while, apart from a string of Busted relationships, another thing that would be common with all of them would be the low self worth. Being insecure for a long time does that to you, and being the common factor in all those failures kinda leads a person to believe that there is something wrong with them. 

Middle script: I ll refer to the J-word as "The mode" 

It usually Goes on like this...

  • You fall in love/ you start to like someone
  • You decide that this is great. 
  • Fear starts to creep in, "You dont wanna mess this up" 
  • They miss a few calls or text msgs 
  • You start assuming stuff 
  • They miss some more calls, reschedule dates/ seem distracted
  • You start to wonder what is wrong, They seemed to like you, then why the absence?
  • You come to a conclusion that they might be into you.
  • Makes you feel bad.
  • The brain does what is does best, in situations like these
  • Find an external source to blame
  • You go stalking
  • You work out the math/ statistics 
  • And find a third person to blame/ come to a conclusion that there might be someone else.
  • You become jealous/ start acting weird to grab attention. 
  • You forget that this person already likes you
  • Your out of character behavior drives this person away. 
  • You become desperate/ either give up/ or do crazy stuff
  • Finally you give up/ your self esteem has taken a hit/ There was someone better/ you were inferior  
People in "the mode" will often report about this "other guy" or "other girl" who would always be the competition, or trust issues even when the relationship was going on. 

Social media makes it worse. 



Everyone has their own way to deal with insecurity, here is what i did...

 I struggled with "the mode" for a long time, and i also concluded that i have fallen into the pattern of considering myself inferior to the competition. Feeling like the 2nd one always led me to feel like i was unattractive, which manifested physically as me getting tanned, gaining weight, hair loss.. and clicking some of the worst dps of all time. 

The pattern of failing relationships continued as well. So i got fed up, decided to reboot... my life, i mean, i knew LOA , sky was the limit, at-least theoretically. I gave it all up, left my job, uprooted from mumbai, moved back to my hometown.. to figure out how i can be the best ie; make a lot of money(guys kinda get a kick out of making money- youre gaining weight; make money! - Suffered a heartbreak; Make money! ), Coz if i am the best then i wont loose to anyone.

Started working out to get back in shape, ate the right stuff, even tried to increase my height by a few inches(didnt work), shaved my head to cure my hair. Time passed on, and the work out started to show results, i was in better shape, but that feeling was still there, coz i was hung up on my last heart break. But i was still far from being the best, My friends and family often told me that i was just torturing myself, throwing my life away, but i had to be the best, so that i would never loose again. I knew i had the problem of going into "the mode" and  i had to find was way to stop being insecure. Figured , if i was better than everyone, i would never be insecure again. 

Stumbling onto the solution

Then it hit me that, i cant be better than who i am, i mean better is anyway a relative term, so if you have to be better than someone, you need that someone to compare with, these someones would be the guys who would snatch away my "the one" every damn time.


Also, which one was i trying to surpass ? Was it the guy who works in her office, or her college friend, or her Ex boyfriend, or any random guy how would pay attention to her... Coz these guys seemed to be infinite in number.

I realized that there is always going to be someone better than me.. so if my problem really is that i think that i am less than them, then i am screwed , coz there is no solution to that.

Then i asked myself, are any of these girls really the best one out there, coz that cant be true, i know girls who are much more prettier, and more fun ... then why am i here, in love with these women.. who clearly arent the best. ???

The answer is love, what makes these relationship special is love, the kind of love that makes me feel a certain way..that other prettier girls dont . Even when i am comfortable with them, they will only be friends, and not special, because they dont make me feel what i need to feel to be in love.

So , if i am willing to settle for someone average (statistically) , shouldnt the other person see the same thing in me, and the fact that i did feel whatever lead me on, means that we both have what it takes to make each other feel whatever we need to feel in order to fall in love and commit.

By that logic, I am fine, and good enough. (It wouldnt have started if i wasnt good enough to be in their life.)

Wow , thats a lot of backstory, pardon me, you simply have to understand one thing..

The Fear that drives you into "the mode", the fear of losing the relationship, is irrational, coz if you wanna see threats there are 3.5 billion of them. Yes there are 3.5 billion other men/women out there, and if you fear "what if he/she runs into someone interesting?" , Guess what...that can happen anywhere and at anytime,  coz everyone in his/her vicinity is interesting in some capacity. And who knows , anything can click with anyone.

What do you do then? I have personally tried to act out of character, just to get attention, i have faked sickness and injury just because i wanted the other person to care... so that i can speed up thing unnaturally. I have seen people turn clingy , crazy , unreasonable and the worst of all controlling. I have seen people forbid their "special someone" to have contact with friends, best friends even family members. But is that the way to keep anyone around? 

Yes.. thats you.. 
The solution

You need to put yourself in the other persons shoes for a while. Would you run off after every random interesting person even when you have a good thing going on with a person that you have chosen to like? If you would... then serves you right, you deserve to be abandoned! But if you are one of the normal ones... you would hold on to the interesting person you already have in your life, coz they are important, and you would like to give it a chance, whatever this is....Now come back into your own shoes, you have to know that there is no competition... If you have invited a decent person in your life,  and this person has chosen to stay, then they will not leave you.. you need not be threatened.. what you really need to pay attention to, is the relationship that you share with this person and cherish it more so that it can transform into something much more solid. 

See... you can waste your time worrying about loss of love... or you can just love. Its you and the other person, no one can come in between you unless you put them there. 

If the love between you two is growing then there is no room for a third person coming in between... This is not about trust, this is about wisdom. Be wise enough to not leave room for a third person, by not paying attention to them. (here i am transcending the laws of psychology and treading into Law of attraction , so you muggles can stop reading now) .

You get whatever you invite, so by being jealous of their best friend/ex/colleague/ family members, you are just inviting them to disrupt your relationship. Hell, just by fearing the loss of the love that you have you are inviting a circumstance that would make that happen (moving out of town/country/planet, finding someone new/ just losing interest because of depression/loss/work/something else). No they are not going to be in love with your "special someone"(that is between them and your special someone) but it will sure seem like that to you , coz you have invited it, and that is what the universe will manifest further. There is no such thing as competition, until you invent and invite it. 

So you want things to get better, you want to see more of them , maybe take the relationship a step further, and you have come to know about this desire of yours through the contrast that you have been feeling in your interactions with them(missing them/ wanting more of them/ feeling the need to take thing further), then, start being appreciative and grateful for what you have with them, and then dream about where you want to take it further, and make sure to explore how it would feel when you are where you want to be. 

take care. 



Tuesday, April 5, 2016

6 Shocking Truth About Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back Really Fast

 If you want to get your girlfriend back you have to do the things contrary to what she might thing you will still do or the opposite you have been thought to do.making your girlfriend to come back by promising her you will change,showering her with flowers, gift and love letters or even trying persuasion tricks,sneaky tactics or manipulative mind games do not work.Only counter intuitive strategies things that you have never considered doing before will rap your girlfriends attention and course her to run back in to your arms.Here are some shocking truths you should know.


Shocking Truth number 1


Do not believe those so called experts who claim that you can get back with your girlfriend with in a specific period of time like 30 days,7days, or even 2 days.

There is no magic way that will bring your girlfriend back within a given number of days because every relationship is unique.Not one specific time line or strategy is true for every situation.Although it is possible to get your ex-girlfriend back in seven days or less.The majority of guys who succeed in getting their girl back do so in the second month,some take two weeks or less and some take three months or more depending on how faithfully they implement their counter intuitive strategies.

Shocking truth number 2

If you are feeling pain over your breakup,you may be killing your chances of getting her back.

You see when you suffer over the break up of your relationship with your ex-girlfriend it causes you to idealize the relationship you had with her.That is you turn to glorify her by focusing only on the positive aspects of the relationship.This then causes you to react out of need and desperation rather than true desire and this only pushes your ex-girlfriend further away from you.Nothing turns a woman "OFF" more than a man who is needy and desperate.The sooner you get rid of those feeling of dis-pare the sooner your ex girlfriend will instantly realize that you do not just NEED HER you simply WANT HER.There is a huge difference between the two and it is a difference that shows sense and respond to immediately.You will not understand the power of this strategy until you try it.

Shocking Truth number three

A slight change in your approach will cause her to practically beg to be with you.

All the relationship books,courses and so called experts give the following advice;
-Act like you are OK with her decision to leave.The problem is they left some thing out that is very important.The key is act like you are OK but you are not OK with her decision to break up with you.That will seems like a slide change but one that will make a tremendous difference from the respond you will get from her.If you act or pretend that every thing is OK she will see right through it and you will not trigger the psychological reaction you want which is to make her want to come back to you.
you also need to make your ex-girlfriend know you are OK with her decision to break up with you but yo can not plainly tell her this.If you use the wrong approach to let her you are doing just fine with out her, you may course her to want to forget about you all together.If you take the right approach it will be long before she is back in your arms.

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Shocking truth number four

The one thing you must never tell a girl after a break up.

Most guys make this mistake after their girl friend breaks up with them.They tell her "I Love you and I will always be there for you.You may thing saying this ten words may course her to come back but it actually creates the opposite of that.It gives her the permission to go out and do what ever she pleases,even date other guys with the assurance that she can always come back to you when ever she wants.And if she is already dating some one else,telling her this ten words is even worst.She will then take the time to get to know the other guy fully compare him to you and then decide who she wants to be with.That is like letting her have her cake and eat it too.

Shocking truth number five

Do not remain friends with your ex-girlfriend!

Most relationship books,curses and so called relationship experts tell you that remaining fiends with your ex girlfriend is a good strategy for getting her back.This is misleading advice based on the wrong assumption that if you remain friends with your ex you will keep other guys away and you will eventually get back together.Actually in 95% of cases,remaining friends with a girl after she breaks up with you increases the likely hood that she will move on to another guy.There are only two circumstances that is OK to remain friends with your ex,you will learn them when you study the counter intuitive strategies.

Shocking truth number six

The "2-tricks"you must never try with your ex (these will push her away to the point of no return)

What is worst than not getting your ex girlfriend back is getting her back only to lose her again soon after some times only a few days or a few weeks.She can also end up hating you on top of it all.This is exactly what happens when you pull tricks,tactics and manipulative mind games that the so call relationship experts teach you.The two most common of these tricks that back fire big time are;
-Deliberately ignoring your ex-girlfriend and


This is reverse psychology at its worst.were reverse psychology does play an important role of getting your girlfriend back,the way of using it may destroy your chances of ever reuniting with your girlfriend and even you do succeed  in getting her back with tricks,you will most likely lose her again before it is too long.Why ,because the problems that coursed the first break up will still be there.Tricks would not get in to the roots of these problems.

Remember in other to get your ex girlfriend back you most do the opposite of what you should do.

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Sunday, March 27, 2016

Does Getting Your Ex Back Work

Does Getting Your Ex Back Work.

If youre looking for Does Getting Your Ex Back Work. Congratulations. Youre the right place. Just a Minute!. You try to learn the content article below. It may help you.

Perhaps there is any feeling in the world that is certainly worse compared to the person you adore letting you know its over? Its heartbreaking to put it mildly. An advanced woman that is desperately crazy about her boyfriend and hes now decided that he just doesnt feel the same way about you, you likely feel as though your entire world has fallen apart. It doesnt have to be that way. If you do truly love him still and you cant imagine a future that doesnt include him, theres help for you. Understanding how to win him back after he dumps you are able to mean the difference between countless days and nights without him and a future that is certainly filled up with deep love and promise.

Finding out how to acquire him back after he dumps you includes recognizing that emotions cannot rule your movements. Its so hard to keep a clear head and clear minded if the man you love tells you which he doesnt feel the same anymore. Youre going to feel desperate and crying is going to become second nature to you, but youve got to hide all of that from him. When a man makes the decision to end a relationship and he knows full well that the woman is still crazy about him, hes anticipating a certain reaction from her. Your boyfriend expects you to become an emotional mess and he knows youll fall apart. Hes ready for it. Thats why its essential for you to do something in direct contrast. Youve got to show him that youre stronger than that and mature enough to handle a change. Hold your emotions in whenever you are around him or talking to him.

The next thing you need to do whenever your boyfriend dumps you may seem almost impossible but its going to push a trigger within him that can make him crave to be with you again. You will reject him to. Dont be cruel about this. Simply tell him that you also believe that a split is in order. While you say this dont cry. Try to remain calm and collected. This one move will shift the dynamic of the relationship in an instant. No longer will you be the rejected one, but youll be the one doing the rejected. Men cant stand rejection. It eats away at them and makes them crave to have whatever rejected them. In no time at all, hell be the one trying to win back your heart.

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